TheCorporateCounsel.net

If you’ve ever seen me in person, you probably guessed from the mustard stains on my shirt (not to mention my waistline) that I love hot dogs. It’s pretty clear that I’m not alone in that sentiment.  According to the National Hot Dog & Sausage Council, Americans consume over 7 billion hot dogs during “hot dog season,” which the Council says runs from Memorial Day to Labor Day. Since Monday is Labor Day, and because frivolity around holidays is one of this blog’s traditions, this seems like an appropriate time for me to pay tribute to my beloved frankfurters.

On Labor Days past, I’ve shared my views on summer cocktails and the right way to cook corn on the cob. And on most Labor Days you can usually find me on my patio grilling corn and some kind of protein over charcoal and enjoying a Dark ‘n Stormy or two. I can’t say that the corn was always accompanied by hot dogs, but they certainly have been a regular part of the rotation over the years.

Sadly, this year finds me on the grilling disabled list. I had a hip replacement a couple of weeks ago and so I’m currently limping around on a cane when I’m not confined to my recliner. Of course, knowing that I can’t prepare some grilled dogs on my own only makes me pine for them more – which in turn gave me the idea for this late summer reverie.

I’ve had hot dogs all across this great land of ours and have yet to encounter a frank I didn’t like.  From the dirty water Sabrett hot dogs in Midtown Manhattan to the Lucky Dogs on Bourbon Street to the Chicago style dogs with radioactive relish and a salad on top to the legendary $1.50 Costco hot dogs, I’ve only got good things to say about them. I even like the very average dogs they sell at the Cleveland Guardians games, which are transformed into something special when you cover them in MLB’s best mustard.

Notwithstanding my embrace of all hot dogs, I have some special favorites, which I will now inflict on those of you who are still reading.

All Hail Western New York!  If you’re going to grill your hot dogs, then Western New York is the place to get them. Rochester has Zweigle’s and Buffalo has Sahlen’s, both of which brands offer hot dogs in natural casings that split open when you grill them, snap when you bite them, and taste absolutely sublime. For a unique taste of my home town, try Zweigle’s White Hots. These are one of Rochester’s three great culinary contributions to our nation – the other two being Chicken French and, of course, Nick Tahou’s Garbage Plate.

Love that Dirty Water.  There’s nothing like a dirty water hot dog from a hot dog cart.  They’re a reliable choice in any city, but if you’re in Cleveland and want something unique from a hot dog cart vendor, give a Polish Boy a shot. You won’t leave hungry – or with a clean shirt.

Where’s the Beef?.  When it comes to all-beef franks at the supermarket, my go to brands are Nathan’s and Hebrew National. No offense to Sabrett, which I know the elites at The New York Times fancy, but you can’t get that brand around here.  Anyway, I think I like the taste of Hebrew National a little more than Nathan’s, although I may be biased by the classic ads I grew up watching. Still, Nathan’s hot dogs are easier to find than Hebrew National where I live and, because I’m a fat pig, I value the availability of their Colossal Quarter Pound Beef Franks.

While I’ve sampled hot dogs near and far, there remain several styles that I’ve yet to try. For example, even though I lived in the Detroit area for a few years when I was very young, I’ve never had a Coney. I’ve also never tried a Sonoran Dog, a Seattle-style Dog, or an LA Street Dog. These are all on my bucket list, and since Americans are infinitely creative, I’m sure I’ll discover others to add to my list as time goes by.

Of course, I’m mindful of the need for moderation in pursuit of completing my hot dog bucket list, because these things aren’t made of kale. I want to hang around long enough for my new hip to wear out, and if I’m too aggressive in my pursuit of hot dog heaven, I might hit my expiration date a lot sooner than my hip does.

Have a great Labor Day, everybody.  Our blogs will be back on Tuesday.

– John Jenkins